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Broken Vows: Why You Should Seek Counseling When Infidelity Threatens Your Marriage

Suspecting your spouse is cheating or proving they have is never an easy thing to face. Feelings of anger and betrayal are often strong enough to send the partner who has been cheated on straight to an attorney's office to file for divorce. While these feelings are understandable, infidelity does not always have to end in divorce, and seeking infidelity counseling can help you decide if your marriage can be saved.

Act as a Mediator

When infidelity is discovered, it can be difficult for the partners to discuss anything at all due to the anger felt by the betrayed spouse. At this critical time, it can be valuable to have an infidelity counselor talk to both parties involved separately to restore communication. This allows couples to have a cooling-off period prior to beginning counseling together.

Analyze Why the Affair Happened

There are many reasons an affair may occur, and a counselor can help you determine what caused the breakdown of your marriage. It is also helpful to determine what type of affair took place. Knowing whether it was a sexual, emotional, or cyber affair will help your counselor know the best course of action to take to restore the relationship.

Understand How an Affair Affects Both Partners

While little sympathy is usually felt towards the cheating spouse, they can also be affected deeply by the affair. They may be affected more if it was an emotional affair and they have feelings for the other person. An infidelity counselor can address those needs and work out a resolution for ending the emotional affair.

The betrayed spouse often feels depressed and may develop low self-esteem or feel they were not good enough because their partner had to seek a relationship with someone else. They may also be dealing with a lot of anger, depression, and feeling hopeless. Their whole world has been turned upside down and they often wonder if things will ever be the same again.

Establish Guidelines for Rebuilding Trust

Rebuilding trust will not happen overnight. An infidelity counselor will establish healthy boundaries for the relationship. This allows the couple to rebuild trust by living under established guidelines, such as each partner having access to the other's phone, having a joint bank account, etc.

Not all marriages end in divorce when infidelity occurs. However, it takes both partners working together to determine if their marriage is worth saving. Marriage restoration following an affair requires a lot of patience and seeing a counselor who specializes in infidelity issues can help you navigate the road to recovery. Reach out to an infidelity counseling service near you to learn more.